There are at least 3 plotlines that seem to have just stopped.
What happened to the "pregnant nurse" and by extension the DJ that did the interview?
What happened to Monica's 2nd pregnancy?
What about the "stalker" that appeared in so much of the documentary footage.
I know this is an epic story that you've been writing for several years now... have you maybe gotten lost in some of the plots? Forgotten storylines?
You have potential to be a really good author! But inconsistencies in the stories can really frustrate and turn off the reader. I understand that reading FanFic is voluntary and that I don't need to continue if I have problems with it. But who wants to leave a story they like unfinished? I do like the story and find most of it to be quite plausible. But, please don't leave those bombshell plots hanging.
I don't know who you are, but I love reading your reviews! Thank you for taking the time to not only read, but to leave such an in depth critique. I do get lost in stories, as I'm currently writing 3. It's no excuse. These two, Jon and Monica, went weird on me and for a time, I lost the passion to write them. When you force it, it never works - I learned that they hard way. Do you write by chance?? Thank you for the compliment, I love to write but struggle some times!
I think I must have missed something...
ReplyDeleteThere are at least 3 plotlines that seem to have just stopped.
What happened to the "pregnant nurse" and by extension the DJ that did the interview?
What happened to Monica's 2nd pregnancy?
What about the "stalker" that appeared in so much of the documentary footage.
I know this is an epic story that you've been writing for several years now... have you maybe gotten lost in some of the plots? Forgotten storylines?
You have potential to be a really good author! But inconsistencies in the stories can really frustrate and turn off the reader. I understand that reading FanFic is voluntary and that I don't need to continue if I have problems with it. But who wants to leave a story they like unfinished? I do like the story and find most of it to be quite plausible. But, please don't leave those bombshell plots hanging.
I don't know who you are, but I love reading your reviews! Thank you for taking the time to not only read, but to leave such an in depth critique. I do get lost in stories, as I'm currently writing 3. It's no excuse. These two, Jon and Monica, went weird on me and for a time, I lost the passion to write them. When you force it, it never works - I learned that they hard way. Do you write by chance?? Thank you for the compliment, I love to write but struggle some times!
DeleteAnother great story! I'm addicted to your writing! I'm so upset I've read all yours already lol...will you have anything new in the near future? :)
ReplyDelete